1. |
Chaos
03:57
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Honey it’s crashing down on me
After all I did perceive
The wrong hell,
I could never melt into your arms nor leave
And it all started with a fall,
I thought I knew myself
I thought I had it all
figured out
Drinking til the early morning
Trying to find a way to call you out
They tell me to forgive, they tell me to lay off
You’re sucker for a chaos
We drive fast in her red car
To get away from the nasty scars
She might leave if we don’t get away
If we don’t lay off
You’re a sucker for chaos
With love, there’s always a way
They say that you have not changed
I’d have to be out of my head to make the same mistake
And then there’s her diving deep in her own world
Til she crashes into the next boy or girl
To lie, fend for, well I could not pretend to care less anymore
Drinking til the early morning
Trying to find a way to call you out
They tell me to forgive, they tell me to lay off
You’re a sucker for a chaos
We drive fast in her red car
To get away from the nasty scars
She might leave if we don’t get away
If we don’t lay off
You’re a sucker for chaos
*Instrumental break*
You’re a sucker for Chaos x 4
Drinking til the early morning
Trying to find a way to call you out
Tell me to forgive, they tell me to lay off
You’re a sucker for chaos
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2. |
Absence & Copyright
04:22
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That, I guess that is that
I am back to believing no ugly deceiving life hacks
Water the plants, the dirt was dry and
I’m growing as twice as fast as you did try
To grow me and shoot me up high
But it felt more like suppression so I put up a fight
Walls so thick, bolder than lipstick
If you’re feeling sad then hold me to that
(And you asked me)
Why did you leave if you were never really there?
Why did I expect you to stay if you were never really there?
I said I needed to leave cause I was never really there
In the first place
What’s new? Country boy
Stay glum til a new girl charges ya ego to the sun
While I stray far away, you still think I’m running from the best thing I had, you’re wrong in every way
But I act like you could be right
Cause it makes ya feel better, helps you sleep at night
(And you asked me)
Why did you leave if you were never really there?
Why did I expect you to stay if you were never really there?
I said I needed to leave cause I was never really there
My lips were covered, I could not make a sound
Well I only just discovered your love was pushing me down
No love, felt in your arms, dominated by your words enough
That I wasn’t worth more than your messed up love
(I said) I needed to leave immediately from this shit hole
You’ve wondered why so often I came off as cold
But your indirect attention to turn success into flaws
I couldn’t live a life feeling so very withdrawn
I needed to leave cause I was never really, there, anymore
Why did you leave if you were never really there?
Why did I expect you to stay if you were never really there?
I said I needed to leave cause I was never really there
In the first place
What’s new? Country boy
Stay glum til a new girl charges ya ego to the sun
While I stray far away
You still think I’m running from the best thing I had
You’re wrong in every way
But I act like you could be right, cause it makes ya feel better, helps you sleep at night
(And you asked me)
Why did you leave if you were never really there?
Why did I expect you to stay if you were never really there?
I said I needed to leave cause I was never really there
My lips were covered, I could not make a sound
Well I only just discovered your love was pushing me down
No love, felt in your arms, dominated by your words enough
That I wasn’t worth more than your messed up love
(I said) I needed to leave immediately from this shit hole
You’ve wondered why so often I came off as cold
But your indirect attention to turn success into flaws
I couldn’t live a life feeling so very withdrawn
I needed to leave cause I was never really, there, anymore
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3. |
Everybody Talks
03:50
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Honestly I wouldn’t know
I know everybody talks
The more I hear, the sweet lulls dear
Of pouring hearts and child based fears
I was in the dark, the rain was pouring hard
And I hear, you’ve been locking yourself in bathrooms
Hiding or running away from the truth, you choose
Rosie, have you rested your bones?
Rosie, have you rested your bones?
Is it hard being this bitter, with all those critters on your toes?
Honestly I wouldn’t know
I know everybody talks
I guess you thought it was your duty
To be the human embodiment of remorse
You did it so well of course
And I hear from the sources you love him
Did he tell you the same things I heard late at night?
Was the truth crisp and dry?
Like a wine you drink chilled with ice?
Rosie, have you rested your bones?
Rosie, have you rested your bones?
Is it hard being this bitter, with all those critters on your toes?
Honestly I wouldn’t know
Everybody talks, everybody
Everybody talks, everybody
Everybody talks, everybody
Everybody talks, everybody
Everybody talks, everybody
Everybody talks, everybody
Everybody talks, everybody talks
Everybody talks, everybody (I know you talk shit about me)
Everybody talks, everybody
Everybody talks, everybody (haven’t heard a word from you since 2017)
Everybody talks, everybody
Everybody talks, everybody
Everybody talks, everybody
Everybody talks, everybody talks
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4. |
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How do you build an ocean?
From the palms of your hands and a block of steel
How do you build an ocean?
Mama always told ya to make what you feel
But now it’s hard, the days are long
You don’t how to feel or who you’ll become
And there’s a sense, of impotence
To manufacture love without giving in
You tried to build me an ocean, but I could smell a man made soul
You can’t build love like that
You can’t choose who you adore
Would you marvel at the light?
You always thought I’ve tried too hard despite
Your grip on everything let go of it, let go of it
Could you let it flood through your heart, through your blood?
You can’t build an ocean, you can’t force love
Hold your peace, I’ll put Johnny Mathis’ sweet surrender on repeat
Cause now it’s time to leave, unless we’ll keep on suffering my dear
Oh now it’s time to lose the fear
Would you marvel at the light?
You always thought I’ve tried too hard despite
Your grip on everything let go of it, let go of it
Could you let it flood through your heart, through your blood?
You can’t build an ocean
You can’t build an ocean
You can’t build an ocean
You can’t force love
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5. |
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Welcomed back to the city lights, I hear he still writes about July
So I stand in my spa, with rose and a heart
Drowning in self pity, loathing you for your art
And I can’t say that I feel bad
I sleep pretty great at night, thank you for asking
You seem to think that you saved my back, but if you were my hero
If you were my hero
Why was I always so sad?
Talk me sober, on the drive home that night
And I thought a God wouldn’t know how it feels
To be alone, nor would I
And I can’t say that I feel bad, you tried to save me, save me back
Cause I realised that I’m all that I have, that if you were my hero
If you were my hero
Why was I always so sad?
Well I hope you had fun, hope you had fun
Tearing it apart
Cause if you were my hero, if you were my hero
If you were my hero
Why was I always so sad?
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6. |
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Go find a wife and have fish on Fridays
Let her feed you with her fork and make noises like an aeroplane
I bet she’s the one that can stop you smoking dope
Comb your hair when you’re drunk
And do the things that stung me too much
Cause I was never too good at holding you together
I recall a time of peace and prosperity
Clinging to your bestest, were you shocked when I messed this up?
No one to drive me around this town, holding me together
Honey, seeping dripping down the cracks
It’ll take me another month and a half to realise I can’t go back
Where is the rope? Try and tie it up
Where is the rope? Try and tie it up
Cause they never spoke of
Where is the rope?
They never spoke on how to hold your own, hold your own self, together
Cause I remember Christmas lunch, when I got back from Holland
We drank cheap champagne
And you asked me what the saddest thing I’d ever seen
And I said seeing my Mama in pain
She was just holding, holding herself together
I pay all due respects to the times that I was left
Unsheltered, I felt it, when I was disassociated
By your world, your darkness
I had to hold me and my selfishness, together
And I have travelled, I have simmered
I have travelled through chaos for a self
To hold it all, hold it all, hold it all, together
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Asha Jefferies Brisbane, Australia
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